Story vs Fact
How often do you separate out your thoughts from the actual facts of a situation?
Photo by MJ S
If I could take a guess, probably not very often.
That’s because as humans, we automatically clump facts and thoughts together into one giant, messy category.
When we say something as simple as, “I’m so bored.” we truly believe we’re just stating a fact about how we currently are. But it’s so important to notice that this is just a THOUGHT, and thoughts are always 100% optional. Whereas facts are 100% not optional.
So let’s get clear about the difference between the two.
Facts:
Facts are the undeniable— proven by a court of law— circumstances of our lives. They are indisputable and completely void of any opinion or preference. Facts are something that everyone in the world must agree on, there is absolutely no room for interpretation.
The concept of feeling ‘bored’ cannot be put into the fact line because what one person may consider boring, another may find thrilling or extremely enjoyable. This is the same for all concepts of our emotional states and behaviors. What may be lewd to one is fairly conservative to another. What is considered horrifying to ‘us’ could be considered extremely normal for ‘them’.
The great thing about the facts of our lives is that they are completely neutral. They do not and cannot cause any emotion or resulting behavior in our lives. If they could, we would all respond identically to the circumstances outside of us. But it is well known that two people can sit and watch the same situation unfold and have verrrrry different opinions about it.
Facts simply exist outside of us and are completely harmless, until a mind comes along and attaches meaning to it.
Story:
Our stories, or the meaning we individually attach to the facts of the world around us, are completely optional and under our control in each moment.
This is where we separate out all of our opinions, biases, beliefs, and moral virtuess that we have accumulated over the years. And begin to recognize— all of it is optional.
We all have different stories. We all have unique backgrounds and experiences that have shaped the thoughts that we hold today. But we aren’t stuck with them—they are not permanent.
In fact, it’s so important that we continuously question and upgrade our thoughts to make sure they are still serving us and our growth as we get older. That’s all that really matters.
Some of our thoughts and stories are extremely outdated and make us feel crazy because we keep thinking or behaving in ways we no longer want to. We would love nothing more than to let them go. But after having practiced a certain thought or belief for decades it can feel nearly impossible to change that story.
That’s because these old stories are hard wired into the subconscious mind and they require the tools and skill of a professional to rewire them. Think of it like electric work for your new home, you wouldn’t hire a painter to come install some wiring. Don’t assume because it is thoughts and emotions were dealing with that you won’t need the help of a professional.
That’s where thought work and life coaching come in.
We are specialized and trained to rewire all things thoughts. This means, no more crippling self doubt or anxiety, no more limiting beliefs around money and relationships, no more putting off your mental, physical and emotional health for another year. It means no longer wallowing and buffering in stories that do not serve you. It means going all in on creating the life of your dreams on purpose instead of putting it off for an illusive, undetermined date in the future.
Sounds like a damn good deal to me.
If you aren’t ready to hire a life coach, simply start on your own by separating out the facts from your own thoughts when you find yourself a little overwhelmed.
This is the first step to building mental and emotional awareness.
